This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
