a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
