Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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