I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
