Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Randomize
