oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
