we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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