quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
