i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
