What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
