I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
whose parrot is this?
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
