The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize
