Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Randomize
