The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
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