Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
