mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
