I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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