we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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