Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
