hell yes lets make some ravioli
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
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