im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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