I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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