glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
