Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
