I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
