kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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