:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
That was an excessively violent trivia night
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
