Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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