break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
No more Irish car bombs ever.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
