i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
3pm strippers are depressing
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
