I want to walk on stilts...naked
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
He has the fingertips of a God
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