it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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