Moan for me like Helen Keller
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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