Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
you had me at cake vodka
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize