I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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