We should be called the Road Head Warriors
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
