where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
