Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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