I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
