I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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