we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
