So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
