I wanna passion pit in your ass
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
