no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
