Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
