My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
