She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Vodka?
Forever.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Randomize
