Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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