The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
