Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
