it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
