How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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